Before I Was This

I feel like I'm constantly stuck in the trauma of transition
Where a new breath starts, the old me begins
If I was who I was, before I was this
Would you like me more
If I was who I was, before I forgot myself
Would you like me more

I can't remember what I wanted to be
But I'm embarrassed of who I am now
I never wanted to grow into this, I'm never any fun to be around
I'm not enough to make anyone break, I wouldn't be around to find out
I could leave as easily as I came
But I don't want to let anyone down

Everything I say is soaked in regret
I feel uncomfortable here
There's no way of avoidance
No chance to disappear
So I'll spend all day surrounded by company
And still end up at home wondering if they like me
If I was who I was before I was this
Would I matter to someone
If I was who I was before I lost my head
Would I like myself

I can't remember what I wanted to be
But I'm embarrassed of who I am now
I never wanted to grow into this, I'm never any fun to be around
I'm not enough to make anyone break, I wouldn't be around to find out
I could leave as easily as I came
But I don't want to let anyone down