Geriatrics
Suman Biswas, Adam Kay
Eight o'clock Monday
Night at the bingo
I finaly talked to a girl
A little older than me
Her name is Mavis
She's a pensioner that I know
She wares a cardigan and slippers
And a pair of false teeth
And when she walks
You can see her nipples touch her knees
She doesn't notice me
'Cause she's watching Countdown
Fancies Terry Wogan
Waits outside the post office
Hours before it opens
Why won't she date me
I hope she doesn't hate me
I know she's nearly eighty
Know she's on H.R.T
As I fail miserably
Trying to get the gran all the old guys want
She's the gran all the old guys want