By Jeeves
It is patently clear any awkwardness here
Can be cleared up in less than a trice
Our identity switch
Who is who? Which is which?
We're in need of some solid advice
There's a painfully simple solution
It's as plain as the nose on your face
By Gad!
By Gosh!
By Heck!
By Gum!
By Rabbit's Foot!
By Kingdom Come! Bertie:
By all my sainted aunt believes!
By George!
By Jove
All By Jeeves!
When we're faced with the grind
Of exerting the mind
We're filled with a deep sense of dread
Bertie: "How on Earth", I hear cries
"Does one give exercise
To a thing that's embedded in your head?"
What we need is a free range consultant
Where on Earth do you find one of those?
Bertie: By Hook!By Crook!
By Way! By Pass!
By Sea! By Air!
By Road!
By Grass!
By Seven Dwarfs! By Forty Thieves!
By George! By Jove! By Jeeves!
By Shuttlecock! Gussie:
By Croquet Hoop!
By Panama!
By Windsor Soup!
By all those cards tucked up his sleeve!
By George! By Jove! By Jeeves!
Our collective IQ of around Forty Two
Cannot cope, to be terribly frank
All true leaders of men
Delegate now and then
Try to keep their minds totally blank
To appreciate loftier matters
Things that go over my head
By Derby Day!
By Nursery Tea!
Bingo: By Moose!
Bertie: By Spoons!
By Half-Past Three!
By every tender breast that heaves!
By George! By Jove! By Jeeves!
By Marmalade!
By Bowler Hat!
By Toothpaste tube!
By Burmese Cat!
By Baby Newts!
By Autumn Leaves!
By George! By Jove! By Jeeves!
Behold how Jeeves, with sleight of hand
Conceives a scheme so carefully planned!
Even we can understand
If he takes it terribly slow-ly
By Basingstoke!
By Cardboard Box!
By Budge's Knees!
By Bassett's Socks!
By each that conjuror deceives!
All: By George! By Jove! By Jeeves!
By Jumping Jack!
By Easy Chair!
By Bain Marie!
By Camembert!
By every fruit bat in the eaves!
By George! By Jove! By Jeeves!
By Walking-Boot!
By Thermal Drawers!
By Canapes!
By Santa Claus!
By all his mighty brain achieves!
By every spell the master weaves!
By Heck! By George!
By Jove! By Jeeves!
By Jeeves! By Jeeves! By Jeeves! BY JEEVES!