The Chance I Start Loving Myself

I've been listening to your heartbeat through my headphones
And playing your voice in my head while
Sitting on the rooftop waiting for some stars to fall
Waiting for you to go
And I tend to live half a life crossing fingers
twiddling my thumbs tying up my tongue
Running in circle
Waiting for you to call me one last time but you might be gone
Cutting limits while I am here
Cutting onions, and they keep saying their opinions and it makes me mad

I keep closing our world inside my headphones
I keep choosing the old sound instead of going on
I keep loving the old times instead of loving myself
And ending up hating myself
Holding on to the memory I'm drowning in
Looking back at the old me I'm soffocating
Giving up on the chance I start loving myself
And ending up hating myself

Looking in the mirror who's the saddest of all
Searching for an answer and it might never come
Looking for a way I can go on, overcome
Closing myself up inside a depressing song
Oh and I'm not overcoming anything
Jump again and again on bad decisions cause I'm overthinking
Lower the lowest I can see the bottom
Lower the highest I'm not going higher
This is so hard for a simple kid like me
And I ain't try to act stupid
Just waiting for you to call me one last time but you might be gone
Cutting limits while I'm still here
Cutting onions, and they keep saying their opinions and it makes me cry

I keep closing our world inside my headphones
I keep choosing the old sound instead of going on
I keep loving the old times instead of loving myself
And ending up hating myself
Holding on to the memory I'm drowning in
Looking back at the old me I'm soffocating
Giving up on the chance I start loving myself
And ending up hating myself