Summer '20
Saw people turn against me
Couldn't even tell me a real reason ostracized me like I committed treason
I saw friends deny me
Saw people lie on me
I got texts were threatening thinking it's the end of things
So I thought about ending it
If I did it will they miss me?
If I took my own life would they remember my feelings
These were the dark thoughts I had wondering would they would miss the kid
And then… then
Then Izu did
All because of a list they tryna cancel the kid
I remember someone said this whole thing is stupid
Cause ain't nobody down that bad from things on the net
While I'm over here thinking that this really the end
I lost some friends, I lost my family, I lost my mind
Thought that I would get over it with time
But when I go outside some people can't look me in the eye cause they know what they said
I ain't never forget
This song I ain't even write a verse because I already wrote all this down
I'm just putting it to the beat yeah these emotion are raw
Maybe I really needed this it made me closer to God
To this day I'll never understand how people treated me dawg
I think about it everyday like how I got trauma from trolls
They apologize in private when their violation was loud
I can't believe I really thought the best of some of the clowns man
Man man man
Feel the pain feel the pain
After this nothing will be the same be the same
Share the pain share the pain
Still me but understand that I changed I changed
Feel the pain feel the pain
After this nothing will be the same be the same
Share the pain share the pain
Still me but understand that
I know that the pain grows
But I know that the love will show
People try to tell you no
But I won't let that stunt my growth
It just really hurts when it's ya cousin
Should've known not all kin are kin
Said we'd talk, never heard again and then you spread all lies
Thought we were intertwined for life
I thought you would love me 'til the day that I die
It's crazy cause we were in the same house for a year it was lit
But I guess even people in house can still go switch
But theres no sides to it everything ain't black and white
Just make sure when you fix a wrong that you get it right
They tried to come for my reputation cause they know that's where it hurts
But if you a man of integrity it don't match with rumors
Even though I feel stupid cause I'm still speaking in blurs
Cause we know if I air it out then it'll expose 'em
But I don't think I'll do that
Just cause other people violate man I won't do that
I think about this everyday like I still am attached
Know my goals a one way road so I never look back
Man i never look back! Because C-see
Man bump what they did to me
Blood sweat and tears for 3 years and couldn't even talk to me
It's so hard when you're trying to go and leave behind a legacy and people actively trying to go discredit me
I'll never forget when someone hit me asking Benji are you okay
And I opened up said no they had nothing else to say
Like what was the point of this? Was it just performative
Used to call you friend but see you called me for the benefits
That's why when you see the people 'round me know that they here for life
If they here now they gon be there when I get me a wife
I thank God for these people that he has provide
These people are the reason that I am here still alive, yeah
Feel the pain feel the pain
After this nothing will be the same be the same
Share the pain share the pain
Still me but understand that I changed I changed
Feel the pain feel the pain
After this nothing will be the same be the same
Share the pain share the pain
Still me but understand that
I know that the pain grows
But I know that the love will show
People try to tell you no
But I won't let that stunt my growth
Yeah I know that the pain grows (yeah the pain may grow)
But I know that the love will show (the love will show, the love will show)
People try to tell me no (people try to tell me no)
But I won't let that stunt my growth (still me but understand that)
God is in control