Pure Comedy
Joshua Michael Tillman
At six
For some reason when I go to the app
The comedy of man starts like this
Our brains are way too big for our mother's hips
And so Nature, she divines this alternative
We emerged half-formed and hope that whoever greets us on the other end
Is kind enough to fill us in
And, babies, that's pretty much how it's been ever since
Now the miracle of birth leaves a few issues to address
Like, say, that half of us are periodically iron deficient
So somebody's got to go kill something while I look after the kids
I'd do it myself, but what, are you going to get this thing its milk?
He says as soon as he gets back from the hunt, we can switch
It's hard not to fall in love with something so helpless
Ladies, I hope we don't end up regretting this
Comedy, now that's what I call pure comedy
Just waiting until the part where they start to believe
They're at the center of everything
And some all-powerful being endowed this horror show with meaning
Oh, their religions are the best
They worship themselves yet they're totally obsessed
With risen zombies, celestial virgins, magic tricks, these unbelievable outfits
And they get terribly upset
When you question their sacred texts
Written by woman-hating epileptics
Their languages just serve to confuse them
Their confusion somehow makes them more sure
They build fortunes poisoning their offspring
And hand out prizes when someone patents the cure
Where did they find these goons they elected to rule them?
What makes these clowns they idolize so remarkable?
These mammals are hell-bent on fashioning new gods
So they can go on being godless animals
Oh comedy, their illusions they have no choice but to believe
Their horizons that just forever recede
And how's this for irony, their idea of being free is a prison of beliefs
That they never ever have to leave
Oh comedy
Oh it's like something that a madman would conceive!
The only thing that seems to make them feel alive is the struggle to survive
But the only thing that they request is something to numb the pain with
Until there's nothing human left
Just random matter suspended in the dark
I hate to say it, but each other's all we got
At six
Às seis
For some reason when I go to the app
Por algum motivo quando eu vou para o aplicativo
The comedy of man starts like this
A comédia do homem começa assim
Our brains are way too big for our mother's hips
Nossos cérebros são muito grandes para os quadris de nossas mães
And so Nature, she divines this alternative
E então a Natureza, ela concebe esta alternativa
We emerged half-formed and hope that whoever greets us on the other end
Emergimos meio formados e esperamos que quem nos receba do outro lado
Is kind enough to fill us in
Seja gentil o suficiente para nos preencher
And, babies, that's pretty much how it's been ever since
E, bebês, é mais ou menos assim que tem sido desde então
Now the miracle of birth leaves a few issues to address
Agora, o milagre do nascimento deixa algumas questões a serem abordadas
Like, say, that half of us are periodically iron deficient
Como, digamos, que metade de nós é periodicamente deficiente em ferro
So somebody's got to go kill something while I look after the kids
Então alguém tem que ir matar algo enquanto eu cuido das crianças
I'd do it myself, but what, are you going to get this thing its milk?
Eu faria isso eu mesmo, mas o que, você vai conseguir o leite para essa coisa?
He says as soon as he gets back from the hunt, we can switch
Ele diz que assim que voltar da caça, podemos trocar
It's hard not to fall in love with something so helpless
É difícil não se apaixonar por algo tão indefeso
Ladies, I hope we don't end up regretting this
Senhoras, espero que não acabemos nos arrependendo disso
Comedy, now that's what I call pure comedy
Comédia, isso é o que eu chamo de pura comédia
Just waiting until the part where they start to believe
Apenas esperando até a parte em que eles começam a acreditar
They're at the center of everything
Que estão no centro de tudo
And some all-powerful being endowed this horror show with meaning
E algum ser todo-poderoso dotou este show de horrores com significado
Oh, their religions are the best
Ah, suas religiões são as melhores
They worship themselves yet they're totally obsessed
Eles adoram a si mesmos, mas estão totalmente obcecados
With risen zombies, celestial virgins, magic tricks, these unbelievable outfits
Com zumbis ressuscitados, virgens celestiais, truques de mágica, essas roupas inacreditáveis
And they get terribly upset
E eles ficam terrivelmente chateados
When you question their sacred texts
Quando você questiona seus textos sagrados
Written by woman-hating epileptics
Escritos por epilépticos misóginos
Their languages just serve to confuse them
Suas línguas apenas servem para confundi-los
Their confusion somehow makes them more sure
Sua confusão de alguma forma os torna mais certos
They build fortunes poisoning their offspring
Eles constroem fortunas envenenando sua prole
And hand out prizes when someone patents the cure
E entregam prêmios quando alguém patenteia a cura
Where did they find these goons they elected to rule them?
Onde eles encontraram esses palhaços que elegeram para governá-los?
What makes these clowns they idolize so remarkable?
O que torna esses palhaços que eles idolatram tão notáveis?
These mammals are hell-bent on fashioning new gods
Estes mamíferos estão obstinados em criar novos deuses
So they can go on being godless animals
Para que possam continuar sendo animais sem deus
Oh comedy, their illusions they have no choice but to believe
Ah comédia, suas ilusões eles não têm escolha a não ser acreditar
Their horizons that just forever recede
Seus horizontes que apenas recuam para sempre
And how's this for irony, their idea of being free is a prison of beliefs
E que tal isso para ironia, sua ideia de ser livre é uma prisão de crenças
That they never ever have to leave
Que eles nunca precisam deixar
Oh comedy
Ah comédia
Oh it's like something that a madman would conceive!
Ah, é como algo que um louco conceberia!
The only thing that seems to make them feel alive is the struggle to survive
A única coisa que parece fazê-los se sentir vivos é a luta pela sobrevivência
But the only thing that they request is something to numb the pain with
Mas a única coisa que eles pedem é algo para anestesiar a dor
Until there's nothing human left
Até que não haja nada humano restante
Just random matter suspended in the dark
Apenas matéria aleatória suspensa no escuro
I hate to say it, but each other's all we got
Odeio dizer isso, mas um ao outro é tudo que temos
At six
A las seis
For some reason when I go to the app
Por alguna razón cuando voy a la aplicación
The comedy of man starts like this
La comedia del hombre comienza así
Our brains are way too big for our mother's hips
Nuestros cerebros son demasiado grandes para las caderas de nuestras madres
And so Nature, she divines this alternative
Y así la Naturaleza, ella divina esta alternativa
We emerged half-formed and hope that whoever greets us on the other end
Emergemos medio formados y esperamos que quien nos reciba al otro lado
Is kind enough to fill us in
Sea lo suficientemente amable para llenarnos de información
And, babies, that's pretty much how it's been ever since
Y, bebés, eso es más o menos cómo ha sido desde entonces
Now the miracle of birth leaves a few issues to address
Ahora el milagro del nacimiento deja algunos problemas por resolver
Like, say, that half of us are periodically iron deficient
Como, digamos, que la mitad de nosotros somos periódicamente deficientes en hierro
So somebody's got to go kill something while I look after the kids
Así que alguien tiene que ir a matar algo mientras yo cuido a los niños
I'd do it myself, but what, are you going to get this thing its milk?
Lo haría yo mismo, pero ¿qué, vas a conseguirle a esta cosa su leche?
He says as soon as he gets back from the hunt, we can switch
Dice que en cuanto vuelva de la caza, podemos cambiar
It's hard not to fall in love with something so helpless
Es difícil no enamorarse de algo tan indefenso
Ladies, I hope we don't end up regretting this
Señoras, espero que no acabemos arrepintiéndonos de esto
Comedy, now that's what I call pure comedy
Comedia, eso es lo que yo llamo pura comedia
Just waiting until the part where they start to believe
Solo esperando hasta la parte en la que empiezan a creer
They're at the center of everything
Que están en el centro de todo
And some all-powerful being endowed this horror show with meaning
Y que algún ser todopoderoso dotó a este espectáculo de horror con significado
Oh, their religions are the best
Oh, sus religiones son las mejores
They worship themselves yet they're totally obsessed
Se adoran a sí mismos pero están totalmente obsesionados
With risen zombies, celestial virgins, magic tricks, these unbelievable outfits
Con zombis resucitados, vírgenes celestiales, trucos de magia, estos trajes increíbles
And they get terribly upset
Y se ponen terriblemente molestos
When you question their sacred texts
Cuando cuestionas sus textos sagrados
Written by woman-hating epileptics
Escritos por epilépticos misóginos
Their languages just serve to confuse them
Sus lenguajes solo sirven para confundirlos
Their confusion somehow makes them more sure
Su confusión de alguna manera los hace más seguros
They build fortunes poisoning their offspring
Construyen fortunas envenenando a su descendencia
And hand out prizes when someone patents the cure
Y entregan premios cuando alguien patenta la cura
Where did they find these goons they elected to rule them?
¿Dónde encontraron a estos matones que eligieron para gobernarlos?
What makes these clowns they idolize so remarkable?
¿Qué hace a estos payasos que idolatran tan notables?
These mammals are hell-bent on fashioning new gods
Estos mamíferos están empeñados en crear nuevos dioses
So they can go on being godless animals
Para poder seguir siendo animales sin dios
Oh comedy, their illusions they have no choice but to believe
Oh comedia, sus ilusiones no tienen más remedio que creer
Their horizons that just forever recede
Sus horizontes que simplemente retroceden para siempre
And how's this for irony, their idea of being free is a prison of beliefs
Y ¿qué tal esto para la ironía, su idea de ser libres es una prisión de creencias
That they never ever have to leave
Que nunca jamás tienen que abandonar
Oh comedy
Oh comedia
Oh it's like something that a madman would conceive!
¡Oh, es como algo que un loco concebiría!
The only thing that seems to make them feel alive is the struggle to survive
Lo único que parece hacerlos sentir vivos es la lucha por sobrevivir
But the only thing that they request is something to numb the pain with
Pero lo único que piden es algo para adormecer el dolor
Until there's nothing human left
Hasta que no quede nada humano
Just random matter suspended in the dark
Solo materia aleatoria suspendida en la oscuridad
I hate to say it, but each other's all we got
Odio decirlo, pero el uno al otro es todo lo que tenemos
At six
À six heures
For some reason when I go to the app
Pour une raison quelconque, quand je vais sur l'application
The comedy of man starts like this
La comédie de l'homme commence ainsi
Our brains are way too big for our mother's hips
Nos cerveaux sont bien trop gros pour les hanches de nos mères
And so Nature, she divines this alternative
Et donc la Nature, elle imagine cette alternative
We emerged half-formed and hope that whoever greets us on the other end
Nous émergeons à moitié formés et espérons que celui qui nous accueille de l'autre côté
Is kind enough to fill us in
Est assez gentil pour nous renseigner
And, babies, that's pretty much how it's been ever since
Et, bébés, c'est à peu près comme ça depuis toujours
Now the miracle of birth leaves a few issues to address
Maintenant, le miracle de la naissance laisse quelques problèmes à résoudre
Like, say, that half of us are periodically iron deficient
Comme, disons, que la moitié d'entre nous sont périodiquement en manque de fer
So somebody's got to go kill something while I look after the kids
Alors quelqu'un doit aller tuer quelque chose pendant que je m'occupe des enfants
I'd do it myself, but what, are you going to get this thing its milk?
Je le ferais moi-même, mais quoi, tu vas donner du lait à cette chose ?
He says as soon as he gets back from the hunt, we can switch
Il dit qu'aussitôt qu'il revient de la chasse, nous pouvons échanger
It's hard not to fall in love with something so helpless
Il est difficile de ne pas tomber amoureux de quelque chose d'aussi impuissant
Ladies, I hope we don't end up regretting this
Mesdames, j'espère que nous ne finirons pas par le regretter
Comedy, now that's what I call pure comedy
Comédie, voilà ce que j'appelle de la pure comédie
Just waiting until the part where they start to believe
Juste attendre jusqu'à la partie où ils commencent à croire
They're at the center of everything
Qu'ils sont au centre de tout
And some all-powerful being endowed this horror show with meaning
Et qu'un être tout-puissant a doté ce spectacle d'horreur de sens
Oh, their religions are the best
Oh, leurs religions sont les meilleures
They worship themselves yet they're totally obsessed
Ils se vénèrent eux-mêmes mais ils sont totalement obsédés
With risen zombies, celestial virgins, magic tricks, these unbelievable outfits
Par les zombies ressuscités, les vierges célestes, les tours de magie, ces tenues incroyables
And they get terribly upset
Et ils se mettent terriblement en colère
When you question their sacred texts
Quand vous remettez en question leurs textes sacrés
Written by woman-hating epileptics
Écrits par des épileptiques misogynes
Their languages just serve to confuse them
Leurs langues ne servent qu'à les confondre
Their confusion somehow makes them more sure
Leur confusion les rend d'une certaine manière plus sûrs
They build fortunes poisoning their offspring
Ils construisent des fortunes en empoisonnant leur progéniture
And hand out prizes when someone patents the cure
Et décernent des prix quand quelqu'un brevète le remède
Where did they find these goons they elected to rule them?
Où ont-ils trouvé ces imbéciles qu'ils ont élus pour les gouverner ?
What makes these clowns they idolize so remarkable?
Qu'est-ce qui rend ces clowns qu'ils idolâtrent si remarquables ?
These mammals are hell-bent on fashioning new gods
Ces mammifères sont déterminés à créer de nouveaux dieux
So they can go on being godless animals
Pour qu'ils puissent continuer à être des animaux sans dieu
Oh comedy, their illusions they have no choice but to believe
Oh comédie, leurs illusions qu'ils n'ont d'autre choix que de croire
Their horizons that just forever recede
Leurs horizons qui ne cessent de reculer
And how's this for irony, their idea of being free is a prison of beliefs
Et voici pour l'ironie, leur idée d'être libre est une prison de croyances
That they never ever have to leave
Qu'ils n'ont jamais à quitter
Oh comedy
Oh comédie
Oh it's like something that a madman would conceive!
Oh c'est comme quelque chose qu'un fou concevrait !
The only thing that seems to make them feel alive is the struggle to survive
La seule chose qui semble les faire se sentir vivants est la lutte pour survivre
But the only thing that they request is something to numb the pain with
Mais la seule chose qu'ils demandent est quelque chose pour engourdir la douleur
Until there's nothing human left
Jusqu'à ce qu'il ne reste plus rien d'humain
Just random matter suspended in the dark
Juste de la matière aléatoire suspendue dans le noir
I hate to say it, but each other's all we got
Je déteste le dire, mais nous n'avons que l'autre.
At six
Um sechs
For some reason when I go to the app
Aus irgendeinem Grund, wenn ich zur App gehe
The comedy of man starts like this
Die Komödie des Menschen beginnt so
Our brains are way too big for our mother's hips
Unsere Gehirne sind viel zu groß für die Hüften unserer Mutter
And so Nature, she divines this alternative
Und so ersinnt die Natur diese Alternative
We emerged half-formed and hope that whoever greets us on the other end
Wir tauchen halbgeformt auf und hoffen, dass uns am anderen Ende jemand freundlich genug empfängt
Is kind enough to fill us in
Um uns aufzuklären
And, babies, that's pretty much how it's been ever since
Und, Babys, so ist es im Grunde seitdem immer gewesen
Now the miracle of birth leaves a few issues to address
Nun, das Wunder der Geburt lässt einige Fragen offen
Like, say, that half of us are periodically iron deficient
Zum Beispiel, dass die Hälfte von uns periodisch an Eisenmangel leidet
So somebody's got to go kill something while I look after the kids
Also muss jemand etwas töten gehen, während ich auf die Kinder aufpasse
I'd do it myself, but what, are you going to get this thing its milk?
Ich würde es selbst tun, aber was, willst du diesem Ding seine Milch geben?
He says as soon as he gets back from the hunt, we can switch
Er sagt, sobald er von der Jagd zurück ist, können wir wechseln
It's hard not to fall in love with something so helpless
Es ist schwer, sich nicht in etwas so Hilfloses zu verlieben
Ladies, I hope we don't end up regretting this
Damen, ich hoffe, wir bereuen das nicht
Comedy, now that's what I call pure comedy
Komödie, das nenne ich pure Komödie
Just waiting until the part where they start to believe
Einfach warten, bis sie anfangen zu glauben
They're at the center of everything
Sie seien das Zentrum von allem
And some all-powerful being endowed this horror show with meaning
Und irgendein allmächtiges Wesen hätte diese Horrorschau mit Bedeutung ausgestattet
Oh, their religions are the best
Oh, ihre Religionen sind die besten
They worship themselves yet they're totally obsessed
Sie beten sich selbst an und sind doch total besessen
With risen zombies, celestial virgins, magic tricks, these unbelievable outfits
Von auferstandenen Zombies, himmlischen Jungfrauen, Zaubertricks, diesen unglaublichen Outfits
And they get terribly upset
Und sie werden furchtbar wütend
When you question their sacred texts
Wenn man ihre heiligen Texte in Frage stellt
Written by woman-hating epileptics
Geschrieben von frauenhassenden Epileptikern
Their languages just serve to confuse them
Ihre Sprachen dienen nur dazu, sie zu verwirren
Their confusion somehow makes them more sure
Ihre Verwirrung macht sie irgendwie sicherer
They build fortunes poisoning their offspring
Sie häufen Vermögen an, indem sie ihren Nachwuchs vergiften
And hand out prizes when someone patents the cure
Und verleihen Preise, wenn jemand das Heilmittel patentiert
Where did they find these goons they elected to rule them?
Wo haben sie diese Trottel gefunden, die sie zu ihren Herrschern gewählt haben?
What makes these clowns they idolize so remarkable?
Was macht diese Clowns, die sie verehren, so bemerkenswert?
These mammals are hell-bent on fashioning new gods
Diese Säugetiere sind darauf versessen, neue Götter zu schaffen
So they can go on being godless animals
Damit sie weiterhin gottlose Tiere sein können
Oh comedy, their illusions they have no choice but to believe
Oh Komödie, ihre Illusionen, an die sie glauben müssen
Their horizons that just forever recede
Ihre Horizonte, die sich einfach immer weiter entfernen
And how's this for irony, their idea of being free is a prison of beliefs
Und wie ist das für Ironie, ihre Vorstellung von Freiheit ist ein Gefängnis von Überzeugungen
That they never ever have to leave
Aus denen sie niemals heraus müssen
Oh comedy
Oh Komödie
Oh it's like something that a madman would conceive!
Oh, das ist etwas, was ein Verrückter sich ausdenken würde!
The only thing that seems to make them feel alive is the struggle to survive
Das Einzige, was sie lebendig zu machen scheint, ist der Kampf ums Überleben
But the only thing that they request is something to numb the pain with
Aber das Einzige, was sie verlangen, ist etwas, um den Schmerz zu betäuben
Until there's nothing human left
Bis nichts Menschliches mehr übrig ist
Just random matter suspended in the dark
Nur zufällige Materie, die im Dunkeln schwebt
I hate to say it, but each other's all we got
Es tut mir leid, es sagen zu müssen, aber wir haben nur einander
At six
Alle sei
For some reason when I go to the app
Per qualche motivo quando vado sull'app
The comedy of man starts like this
La commedia dell'uomo inizia così
Our brains are way too big for our mother's hips
I nostri cervelli sono troppo grandi per i fianchi di nostra madre
And so Nature, she divines this alternative
E così la Natura, lei divina questa alternativa
We emerged half-formed and hope that whoever greets us on the other end
Siamo emersi semi-formati e speriamo che chiunque ci accoglie all'altro capo
Is kind enough to fill us in
Sia abbastanza gentile da informarci
And, babies, that's pretty much how it's been ever since
E, bambini, è più o meno così da sempre
Now the miracle of birth leaves a few issues to address
Ora il miracolo della nascita lascia alcune questioni da affrontare
Like, say, that half of us are periodically iron deficient
Come, diciamo, che metà di noi sono periodicamente carenti di ferro
So somebody's got to go kill something while I look after the kids
Quindi qualcuno deve andare a uccidere qualcosa mentre io guardo i bambini
I'd do it myself, but what, are you going to get this thing its milk?
Lo farei io stesso, ma cosa, stai per dare a questa cosa il suo latte?
He says as soon as he gets back from the hunt, we can switch
Dice che appena torna dalla caccia, possiamo scambiarci
It's hard not to fall in love with something so helpless
È difficile non innamorarsi di qualcosa di così indifeso
Ladies, I hope we don't end up regretting this
Signore, spero che non finiremo per pentircene
Comedy, now that's what I call pure comedy
Commedia, ecco cosa chiamo pura commedia
Just waiting until the part where they start to believe
Aspettando solo la parte in cui iniziano a credere
They're at the center of everything
Che sono al centro di tutto
And some all-powerful being endowed this horror show with meaning
E che un essere onnipotente ha dotato questo spettacolo orribile di significato
Oh, their religions are the best
Oh, le loro religioni sono le migliori
They worship themselves yet they're totally obsessed
Adorano se stessi eppure sono totalmente ossessionati
With risen zombies, celestial virgins, magic tricks, these unbelievable outfits
Da zombie risorti, vergini celesti, trucchi magici, questi incredibili abiti
And they get terribly upset
E si arrabbiano terribilmente
When you question their sacred texts
Quando metti in discussione i loro testi sacri
Written by woman-hating epileptics
Scritti da epilettici misogini
Their languages just serve to confuse them
Le loro lingue servono solo a confonderli
Their confusion somehow makes them more sure
La loro confusione in qualche modo li rende più sicuri
They build fortunes poisoning their offspring
Costruiscono fortune avvelenando la loro prole
And hand out prizes when someone patents the cure
E distribuiscono premi quando qualcuno brevetta la cura
Where did they find these goons they elected to rule them?
Da dove hanno trovato questi buffoni che hanno eletto per governarli?
What makes these clowns they idolize so remarkable?
Cosa rende così notevoli questi clown che idolatrano?
These mammals are hell-bent on fashioning new gods
Questi mammiferi sono ossessionati dall'idea di creare nuovi dei
So they can go on being godless animals
Così possono continuare ad essere animali senza dio
Oh comedy, their illusions they have no choice but to believe
Oh commedia, le loro illusioni non hanno altra scelta se non quella di credere
Their horizons that just forever recede
I loro orizzonti che si allontanano per sempre
And how's this for irony, their idea of being free is a prison of beliefs
E come questa per ironia, la loro idea di essere liberi è una prigione di credenze
That they never ever have to leave
Che non devono mai mai lasciare
Oh comedy
Oh commedia
Oh it's like something that a madman would conceive!
Oh è come qualcosa che un pazzo concepirebbe!
The only thing that seems to make them feel alive is the struggle to survive
L'unica cosa che sembra farli sentire vivi è la lotta per sopravvivere
But the only thing that they request is something to numb the pain with
Ma l'unica cosa che chiedono è qualcosa per intorpidire il dolore
Until there's nothing human left
Fino a quando non rimane più nulla di umano
Just random matter suspended in the dark
Solo materia casuale sospesa nel buio
I hate to say it, but each other's all we got
Mi dispiace dirlo, ma l'uno per l'altro è tutto ciò che abbiamo