Stillborn

I wonder if depression ever ends
Or if it will end me
I’m still dancing on the edge of the blade
Till it cuts me in half
Some days I feel everything at once
Other days I feel nothing at all
So what’s worse?
Drowning beneath the waves or dying from the thirst?

I dropped my Prozac from one day to the other
I do not regret, why should I bother?
I just wonder what will happen?!
Maybe it will kill me… …eventually set me free…

Neither do I ask the night to explain
I wait for it and it envelops me
And so you, me, gloom and light…
…and shadows… …are…

Don‘t charm away my melancholy, it‘s everything I’ve got
To me it’s kind of death, but I‘m forced to keep living
I won’t glorify or romanticize what you call heartbreak
But nothing in this world was promised or belonged to you…

Someday someone won’t be afraid of the lows I drag
They won’t stay on the shore, they’ll meet me in the depths

I am not dead but also not alive
I seem like a ghost with a beating heart
Cause death is not the greatest loss in life
But what dies inside us while we fledge

We are walking away quietly into empty spaces
We are trying to close the gaps of the past
Cause of all sad words of tongue or pen
The saddest are these: It might have been

Don’t charm away my melancholy, it‘s everything I’ve got
To me it’s kind of death, but I‘m forced to keep living
I won’t glorify or romanticize what you call heartbreak
But nothing in this world was promised or belonged to you…

…was promised or belonged to you