Nonkilling 3/The Anteroom/False Skull 1

A body can make you think that
Colors obtain in things

Like Maggie Nelson said
"The color
Inside of the"

Can I feel nostalgia for
A death I will never know?

The silence of silence
This is all
That I've ever wanted

When I woke up in the tub
Invisible wrecked ships
Circled around my head

A voice
Screamed:

"You wouldn't want it
If you could see the pain in the anteroom"

You wouldn't applaud it
Nothing on this side was built for you"

And now you're laughing
Would you laugh when they play it all back
And in the movie of your life
You only speak in one scene?

And when the door opens, you say
"I've been thinking about it my whole life long"
And when they ask you what you mean

Your lips are moving
But the mic's not on

Thought it was a pool of blood
But then when the camera stopped

The whole thing evaporates
A voice with no body shouts

"The money has all run out
What we used to call a job

Is now handled by machines
You can die in peace"

"You wouldn't want it
If you could see the pain in the anteroom
You wouldn't applaud it

Nothing on this side was built for you"

And now you're laughing
Would you laugh when they play it all back
And in the movie of your life
You only speak in one scene?

And when the door opens, you say
"I've been thinking about it my whole life long"
And when they ask you what you mean

Your lips are moving
But the mic's not on

What have you been trying to say?
Is this a joke or some kind of mistake?

No one's counting
The days
Until your whole
Little body
Becomes
Even less
Than decay