Beauty of Breathing

Sometimes I wanna take the car out on the road
Flip it into park and smash myself
Into a million little pieces

I'm tired of knowing what about myself is wrong
But never mustering up the control
To really try and change it

I walk outside and people say, "Hey!"
And sometimes I just wanna say
"Hey! Go away! Go away!"
So I guess I better stay inside

I heard that if you just sit on a chair and think
Of focusing your nervous energy
On the beauty of breathing
You could live a life of real tranquility
But I just thought of every stupid thing
That's been keeping me from sleeping

I close my eyes and it won't go away
I plug my ears but they're ringing out
"Hey! Hey! Hey!"

It keeps me from believing
That maybe someday the thing will work
Maybe I won't feel like a jerk
Maybe the words I say will stop coming out weighted
Maybe some day I'll wanna breathe
And maybe the people that I meet
Won't lead to a certain future where
I'm betrayed and, and
I'm so jaded
I'm so jaded
And that's why I'm so fucking sad