It Doesn’t Matter to Him
If I think about it
I am successful as it were
I get to sing for lovely people
All over this lovely world
And I am no where near as awkward
As I was when I was younger
I guess I'm one of those guys
Who gets better looking as they age
And even though I have felt beaten down
By constant doubt
Depression and confusion
Brought about by people's actions
Death and tax forms
I keep getting up
And I am loves by all my friends and family
Though there have been
Lots of raised eyebrows
And concerned glances lately
It doesn't matter to him
I could be anything
But I could never win his heart again
It doesn't matter to him
He took away my triple a pass
I am invisibe to him
And now I feel the soft pink flesh
Of my heart hardening
To the countless possibilities
Contained within each day
Vulnerability feels like
A cold wet concrete room lit
With florescent lighting
Which as you know
Makes everything look bad
I still keep trying to figure out
How I became irrelevant
How I got myself evicted
From his heart from one day to the next
And the worst part is
That even if I got an answer right now
It will not change anything
Because we have become two strangers