Sanford

[Verse 1]
The greatest comedian in all of television
Everybody love him but he's a good for nothin'

He's hilarious
He's notorious

Don't know why but he like to pester
Julio, Grady, and Aunt Esther
Tellin' she, she face like asbestos
And talking about crazy Mister

[Chorus]
Sanford, Sanford, Sanford, Sanford and his son
They two stinker!

(Elizabeth) This is a big one, baby
(Elizabeth) Comin' to meet you, honey
(Elizabeth) This is a big one, baby
(Elizabeth) Oh, you expect me to believe a [?] old story like that?

(Sanford, Sanford, Sanford)

[Verse 2]
Never ask him to work 'cause hе is driving a truck
Lamont could never insist when Frеd have arthritis

He's a real champ
He's a damned scamp

This horrible, lovable old cuss
Very stingy and cantankerous
Even he own son he double cross
In telling lies he really is a boss

[Chorus]
Sanford, Sanford, Sanford, Sanford and his son

(Elizabeth) This is a big one, baby
(Elizabeth) Comin' to meet you, honey
(Elizabeth) This is a big one, baby
(Elizabeth) Why don't you put your face in some dough and make some gorilla cookies?

(Sanford, Sanford, Sanford)

[Verse 3]
No one gets a good word from Junkyard Freddie I'm told
He is much too liberated and self-opinionated

He's a schemer
A blasphemer

Esther always takin' a wisecrack
Anytime she tell him something back
Then he gets a phony heart attack
Staggerin' to give it, move him back

[Chorus]
Sanford, Sanford, Sanford, Sanford and his son
Them two stinker!

(Elizabeth) This is a big one, baby
(Elizabeth) Comin' to meet you, honey
(Elizabeth) Oh, Elizabeth! Oh! Oh!
(Elizabeth) Oh!

(Sanford, Sanford, Sanford)

What weighs four hundred pounds, seven feet tall, looks like a grizzly, and has no teeth?

Your mama!

[Verse 4]
If I'm to adjudicate, well, Sanford & Son is great!
The role they give black actors and could pass with flying colors

He's a dancer
A romancer

When you see he drink up he Ripple
And he start to walk like a cripple
Pokin' fun at all ethnic people
He will make you laugh in a dribble

[Chorus]
Sanford, Sanford, Sanford, Sanford and his son

(Elizabeth) This is a big one, baby
(Elizabeth) Comin' to meet you, honey
(Elizabeth) This is a big one, baby
(Elizabeth) Comin' to meet you, baby

(Sanford, Sanford, Sanford)

[Outro]
I'll be the one with the big [?] on meh back!
[?] if it is true
If I didn't care for you