Helter Stupid

*phone rings*
This is Tom Krattenmacher calling from Rolling Stone Magazine. Can I speak to someone in Negativland?
NOW!
Can you comment on the connection that was made between your music, uh, and the axe murders last month in Rochester, Minnesota?
NOW IT BEGINS!
Can you tell me, off the record, is there any backwards masking on the song "Christianity is Stupid"?
!SNEGIB TI WON

NOW!
NOW!
We have to listen to that, and then when we went to sleep at night, in our dreams we would hear
Christianity is stupid, Christianity is stupid
Christianity is stupid, Christianity is stupid
Communism is good, Communism is good, Communism is good
Give up, give up, give up
*laughs* Is this a joke? It's a monstrous joke!
TONIGHT! TONIGHT, YES, TONIGHT!
*laughs* Is this a joke?
You need a place to spend the night, and we provided it
I can’t get no satisfaction
You need sex, so we provided the girls
Sock it to me baby (Is this a joke?)
Sock it to me baby, sock it to me baby, sock it to me baby...

TONIGHT!
TONIGHT!
Gimme gimme what you got
(It's a monstrous joke!)
And when it comes to killing you
And when it comes to killing you
And when it comes to killing you
And when it comes to killing you
And when it comes to killing you
And when it comes to killing you
And when it comes to killing you
(*laughs* Is this a joke?)
And when it comes to killing you
And when it comes to killing you
And when it comes to killing you
(*laughs* Is this a joke?)

And when it comes to killing you
They like to use every means in the book!
It's a week of psychopaths, murderers, werewolves
Murdering marauding maniacs
It was the kind of murder case that friends and neighbors said didn’t make sense
They didn't understand (What did I say?)
They didn't understand (What did I say?)
They didn't understand (What did I say?)
They didn't understand, Christianity is stupid
*laughs* Is this a joke? (Give up)
It's a monstrous joke
Gentlemen! (NOW!)
Gentlemen! [?]

That is not the case (Journalism or sensationalism?)
A malicious tale about a maniac (Murder and music)
You give enough monkeys (Murder and music)
(Journalism or sensationalism?)
Enough typewriters (Murder and music)
(Journalism or sensationalism?)
And enough time (Murder and music)
(Journalism or sensationalism?)
And one of them will eventually come up with the King James version of the Bible (Murder and music)
(Journalism or sensationalism?)
Your Bible (We don't have enough data)
Your Bible (We don't have enough data)
(We don’t have enough data)
Your Bible (Data, we don’t have enough data)
(We just don't have enough data)
It’s monkey business! (And that's why I'm saying)
Even a monkey could produce the King James version of the Bible!
(Data, data, data)
Too much data

He was not a homicidal maniac, he...did not show any...
(Have mercy upon me, O Lord)
...signs of wanting to hurt anyone
(For I am in trouble)
The crime is somehow related to a record by a Bay Area band
Hal Eisner has that story
(Mine eyes consumed with grief)
Many are still wondering why
(Yea, my soul, my being)
I can't get no satisfaction
(Why me, Lord?)
You’re overreacting
(My strength faileth because of mine iniquity)
You're overreacting
(And my bones are consumed)
Don't find excuses for it
The easiest thing to do is do what he did
(Why me, Lord?)
Apologize
(I was forgotten, as a dead man out of mind)
He apologized
(I am like a broken vessel)
But that's America
(Why me, Lord?) (Like, I'm considered a creep)
And you're overreacting
(O wretched man that I am)
A creep
(Who shall deliver me from the body of this death?)
The creep (What?)
I'm gonna have to cut it out now, we're overreacting
We'll be back after these messages

KTVU for Thursday, October 30th, stereo version
Al's House of Meat, 2222 on the Sirloin Strip!
Fine, we're going to play that back now
Did you hear that?
What?
Something on that tape, when it ran backwards
What are you talking about?
Run it down again
Now play it, backwards
(That child is the child of evil)
I don't believe it
He never sounded so good
I'm serious, play this backwards and you hear evil messages
Play the rest
We're gonna play that one back
There it is again
Don't start
I mean it, play it backwards
(Last night he murdered his parents, tonight his targets are his aunt and uncle)
Doesn't it bother you that evil messages creep into our commercials when you play them backwards?!
Stranger things have happened
Play the rest
(Little David is all grown up. Too bad for the cause of good!)
You're not going to play the rest?
Look, I rent this studio by the hour
What is it trying to tell us?!
*evil laughter*

Death Wish 2, 2 Wish Death, Death Wish 2, 2 Wish Death
Death Wish 2, 2 Wish Death, Death Wish 2, 2 Wish Death
Death Wish 2, 2 Wish Death
Death Wish 2, rated R, under-17 not admitted without parent
Look at that listing of sins in Galatians 5, verses 19-21
Seventeen of them
If you have 26 Americans to kill (S-I-M, S-I-M)
And you've already killed 17 americans (P-L-O-T, P-L-O-T)
How many Americans does that leave for you to kill? (Simplot)
Sock it to me baby (S-I-M)
(Sock it, sock it, sock it...)
Why are the children (P-L-O-T)
Doing what they're doing? (S-I-M)
Why are the children (P-L-O-T)
Doing what they're doing? (Murder and music)
(Simplot) (Murder and music, murder and music)
(Simplot, Simplot, Simplot)
Sock it to me baby

This isn't the first time, this isn't the first time
This isn't the first time, this isn't the first time
(Look out!)
This isn't the first time, this isn't the first time
Controversial music has been linked to tragedy
(Look out! Look out! Look out!...)
It's all right for them to slap our face
(It's monkey business!) (You're overreacting)
It's all right for them to slap our face (Give up)
Why are the children doing what they're doing? (Noise)
Why does a child reach up and kill his mom and dad and murder his two little sisters, and then cut his throat? (Noise)
Huh? Why would a child do something like that?
(Noise, what it is and what it does to you)

Look out!
Helter stupid
Helter stupid
Helter stupid

It is depressing when the whole family is picking on you. You know, whether it's because you did something wrong, but...I think he was depressed...[?]

(I can't get no)
Helter stupid (Satisfaction)
Helter stupid (I can't get no)
Helter stupid (Satisfaction)
Now... (Helter stupid)
Look out! (Stupid)

I'm gonna tell you something that you're not gonna like, probably the world ain't gonna like, but I'll tell it to you just like it is. If I wanted to, had it been me up in the Sharon Tate's house, it would have been a lot worse. Thank God that your children did it for you, and I didn't get started on it, 'cause if I'd have got started on it, it would have been a lot worse than it was. Because I am ten times worse

It's believed night stalker suspect Richard Ramirez was influenced by AC/DC's Highway To Stupid album. Ozzy Osborne's song "Stupid Solution" became the focal point of an actual stupid case involving a Southern California teenager
*laughs* It's a monstrous joke! (Stupid)
Our opposition, whoever they may be, in all their manifest forms, don't know how to handle humor. You know? And we're humorous, and we stand a better chance under that guise. Because all the serious people, like Martin Luther King and Kennedy and Gandhi, got shot...

Now listen, now listen, now listen...
Now listen to this
It was the kind of murder song that friends and neighbors said didn't make sense
No one, no matter where he lives, or what he does, can be certain who next will suffer from some senseless act of bloodshed
(But, that's America)
And yet it goes on and on and on in this country of ours
(That's America)
Now that second one is really Robert Kennedy, right? Wrong
Hmm? (Hal Eisner)
Wrong. Neither of these is the real voice of anyone, and we must never believe that it is
Oh, but that was really Robert Kennedy? (Hal Eisner)
They are both electronic images of the real voice preserved on magnetic tape. Just as we never see a dead body on television news, we must never believe that we do
Our TVs are murdering people every fifteen minutes
You see two or three people dying on TV...

Meanwhile the members of Negativland are hoping for a speedy conclusion to the Brom song (Give up)
It's really frightening, but at the same time it's ridiculous
And then you got guys now that got the controls but they don't have the power. You take somebody with the power at the controls and you watch the whole buggy rock...
But a quick end to the bizarre murder song may be in doubt
And I'm not afraid of dying because I don't believe in it. I think it's just getting out of one car and getting into another

Give up, give up, give up...(NOW!)
Chrisianity is stupid, Communism is good...
Good, good, good, good...
In our dreams we would hear
Christianity is stupid, Communism is good
Communism is Christianity, Christianity is Communism
Good is stupid, stupid is good
Good, stupid, good, stupid...

But they said there was something that got to them more than the words of the song (Words)
Something that got to them more than the words of the song (Words)
There was something that got to them more than the words of the song (Words)
But they said there was something that got to them more than the words of the song (Words) (Tonight!)
(And every boy and girl feels, to be a hero, they got to pull their clothes off)
And it was the beat! (Just words!)
And it was the beat! (Just words!)
The beat! (Get over!)
And it was the beat! (Words!)
The beat! (Just words! Words, just words!) (Get over!)
And it was the beat!
The beat, the beat!
The beat, the beat!
Louder and faster, louder and faster!
Louder and faster, louder and faster!
Louder and faster, louder and faster!
Louder and faster, louder and faster!
Faster! (The beat!) (Get over!)
(Look out!)
The probe apparently involved their stupid song
Christianity didn't make sense
(Stupid, stupid, stupid, stupid...)

Let's play a game
Let's play a game (Okay? Okay? Okay? Okay?...)
Let's play a game
Let's play a game (Okay? Okay? Okay? Okay?...)
We're taking our microphone to different locations
(We don't have enough data)
To different places
(Christianity is stupid...)
Your job is to close your eyes, listen very carefully, and decide where we are and what is happening
(Christianity is stupid...)
Okay? Okay? Okay? Okay?
(Give up)
Attorneys say David and his parents frequently argued about religion and music
Okay? Okay? (We don't have enough data) (Give up)
Okay? Okay? (Christianity is stupid)
Close your eyes (Christianity is stupid)
Listen very carefully (Christianity is stupid)
Close your eyes (Christianity is stupid)
Okay? Okay? (Helter stupid, helter stupid)
Close your eyes (Helter stupid, stupid, stupid...)
Listen very carefully (Christianity is triggering the murders)
Close your eyes (Christianity is thought-provoking)
Listen very carefully (Even humorous)
I think we don't accomplish anything by going on like this
This is the same thing you've been saying over and over again
*laughs* Is this a joke?

Well, we're going to listen to those sounds again
(We don't have enough data)
This time, I'm going to ask you to do something besides just listen (Tonight!)
I would like for you and your friends to pretend you're actually in the places you hear (Tonight!)
Make believe that you're doing something
(We don't have enough data)
And while you're pretending and having fun
(We don't have enough data) (Too much data)
Please ask yourself this question
(And what will become of me?)
(And what will become of me?) (We don't have enough data)
Please ask yourself this question
(A photocopy of a diagrammatic analysis of a report...)
Please ask yourself this question...
Is God here? (It's a monstrous joke!)
Is God here? In this place? Doing this kind of thing?

Now listen to this:
L-E-O-N-A, (Who?) and I'm with Channel 5 News. (Well, I don't know) I'm calling regarding the group and (Yeah?) this article that I'm looking at here in my hand from [?] (Yeah, okay, sure. Hey, one of you got a name sounds something like Friday?) I don't even know if that's legal or not, (That's right) (Well you're being stood up) and I wanted to [?] etc etc etc, (Huh?) (She said to tell you not to wait) but it would need some kind of cooperation from you or members of your group, in order to do the story...

KPIX Eyewitness News Nightcast is next
(Data, data, data...) (Helter stupid, Helter stupid...)
This isn't the first time someone has tried to blame a death on Hal Eisner. A Los Angeles couple claimed their son committed suicide while listening to a Hal Eisner story. The judge in that case ruled there was no proof that our report was responsible for the boy's death
I'm Hal Eisner. (Journalism or sensationalism?)
And he's appealing. (Too much data) (We don't have enough data)
(We just don't have enough data)
(Give up)
Oh no...

(We don't have enough data) (repeat)
Too much data... (repeat)
Oh no...
That's one of my big problems today
That's one of my big problems today
Books, files, photographs
Books, files, photographs
Books, files, photographs
Newsreels by the million miles
But I should think you'd be so glad to have all this material?
But how to use it, dear lady?
But how to use it... (echo)
And yet it goes on and on and on
Now I know too much and find it hard to make out any patterns. Just clatter and babble and get the feel and move on before I get buried in videotape. (It's a monstrous joke!)
This record you're listening to now is another one
(Helter stupid, helter stupid)

(How do you go about getting an exorcism?)
(Christianity is stupid)
(I can help.)
It's Richard Burton! (Oh no...)
He's a modest priest. (Praying. Have you tried praying?) (Stupid)
And if you think going one-on-one with the Prince of Darkness is sticky, whoo, wait until you see the rest of the characters he has to contend with!
Now there's a bizarre connection to a Bay Area band
(Come on, man, it's a big act)

(Oh, ladies and gentlemen)
(Oh, ladies and gentlemen)
(Oh, ladies and gentlemen)
If you kill eight or ten people, and you throw blood all over 'em, and you say, "Now you see what I'm sayin'?!" they say, "Ohh, we see what you're sayin'" and they still don't see what you're...
(Oh, ladies and gentlemen, three or four years, American life as we know it will be over!)

Come on, man, it's a big act. Goddamn thing's a fuckin' act, man. What I said right then is a fuckin' act. Everything's an act. It's all an act. The only thing that's not an act, the only thing that makes reality, is death. Then they hang it on a cross, kneel down and pray to it. That's the only reality they understand

The fault, dear Brutus, is not in our stars, but in ourselves
(That is correct)
Good night, and good luck