Doctor Freud
Oh it happened in Vienna
Not so very long ago
When not enough folks were getting sick
That a starving young physician tried
To better his position
By discovering what made his patients tick
Oh Doctor Freud, Oh Doctor Freud
How we wish you had been differently employed
For this set of circumstances
Surely enhances the finances
Of the followers of Doctor Sigmund Freud
He forgot about sclerosis but
Invented the psychosis
Plus a hundred ways that sex could be enjoyed
He adopted as his credo, down repression
Up libido
That was the start of Doctor Sigmund Freud
Oh Doctor Freud, Oh Doctor Freud
How we wish you had been differently employed
For this set of circumstances
Surely enhances the finances
Of the followers of Doctor Sigmund Freud
He analyzed the dreams of
The teens and libertines
He substituted monologues for pills
He drew crowds just like Will Sandler
When along came Jung and Adler
They said 'By God
There’s gold in them there hills'
They encountered no resistance as they
Served as Freud's assistants
And with ego and with id they deftly toyed
Instead of toting bedpans
They wore analytic deadpans
Those ambitious doctors Adler, Jung
And Freud
Now the big three have departed
But not so this thing they started
It’s been carried on by many a goodly band
And to trauma, shock, and war shock
Someone went and added Rorschach
The thing has got completely out of hand
Oh Doctor Freud, Oh Doctor Freud
How we wish you had been differently employed
For this set of circumstances
Surely enhances the finances
Of the followers of Doctor Sigmund Freud