Fuck You It's Christmas

Face covered in some barbecue sauce
I'll dress up like a drunk Santa Claus
And if I see one more
Rich person getting a car
I'm 'bout to burn
That motherfucker's garage
(It's Christmas)
My family creepy as it gets
Grandpa kiss me on the lips, ick
Fuck you it's Christmas
I don't wanna hold your kid
That's some scary fucking shit, ick
Fuck you it's Christmas

All through the night
Little spoiled-ass kids dream about
What they might get
All through the night, I contemplate about
Which blunt I might hit, lickity split
All through the night
I congratulate my sister on becoming a vegan
All through the night
I ponder about an excuse to
Leave for the legion
My uncle bragging that this his last d dub
I'll let that plate past me up
That food looks nasty as fuck (Hm-m)
Wow, nonstop, giving advice, right
Like your life ain't broken
Wow, thank you for pressuring marriage
In front of my girlfriend
Still can't tell my nephews apart
And my stepfather thinks he's in charge

And if I see one more
Rich person getting a car
I'm 'bout to burn
That motherfucker's garage
(It's Christmas)
My family creepy as it gets
Grandpa kiss me on the lips, ick
Fuck you it's Christmas
I don't wanna hold your kid
That's some scary fucking shit, ick
Fuck you it's Christmas

Real quick, I didn't get nobody shit
I don't want talk politic
Yes, I know I've gotten big
Who the fuck is that lil kid
Who's taking shots in the kitchen?
I'm down to assist
I don't want sit next to uncle, he smell
You got diabetes this year I can tell
Look up the location of nearest hotel
Somebody help
Somebody help me 'fore they start karaoke
Oh no here go hokey pokey
I think I need lil smokey (Ho, ho)
My mama wanna wash my mouth out with soapy
I'm brown out drunk on the lowkey
Somebody throw me a floatie (Ho, ho)

Face covered in some barbecue sauce
I'll dress up like a drunk Santa Claus
And if I see one more
Rich person getting a car
I'm 'bout to burn
That motherfucker's garage
(It's Christmas)
My family creepy as it gets
Grandpa kiss me on the lips, ick
Fuck you it's Christmas
I don't wanna hold your kid
That's some scary fucking shit, ick
Fuck you it's Christmas

If you'd rather leave your family and
Go kick it with your friends
Say "Fuck you it's Christmas"
If you'd rather keep your money
Then go out and overspend
Say "Fuck you it's Christmas"
Whoo hoo hoo

"Ay, uh, if you know anybody between the
Ages of 3 and 12
Play this song for them, know what I mean
Make sure they hear this
The harsh realities of the world
They need to be aware of that
You know what I mean
Santa Claus is real, though
Santa Claus is real, though"