Paralyzing

Paralyzing

I lay here on the kitchen floor staring
At the ceiling
Numb feeling

I turn my phone off to block out all the noise but
I can’t escape it
I can’t take it

And every night
There’s a war
In my head

And it’s so paralyzing
And nobody knows what I’m like
I’m self sabotaging
Cos I’m always too scared to try

wanna be a lover
wanna be a fighter
But all I ever do is hide
and fucking lie here
I’m a stranger
In my own eyes
Wishing I were someone
Better at my life

It’s so paralyzing
Oh
Oh

Keep faith is what everybody tells me
It’s not forever
It gets better

But every night
There’s still a war
In my head

And it’s so paralyzing
And nobody knows what I’m like
I’m self sabotaging
Cos I’m always too scared to try

wanna be a lover
wanna be a fighter
But all I ever do is hide
and fucking lie here
I’m a stranger
In my own eyes
Wishing I were someone
Better at my life

It’s so paralyzing
Ooh
Ooh

I try to pick myself back up
Keep my demons out of touch
Like maybe that could be enough
To keep me hanging on

So every night
There’s a war
I keep fighting

And it’s so paralyzing
And nobody knows what I’m like
I’m self sabotaging
Cos I’m always too scared to try

wanna be a lover
wanna be a fighter
But all I ever do is hide
and fucking lie here
I’m a stranger
In my own eyes
Wishing I were someone
Better at my life

It’s so paralyzing
Ooh
Ooh
It’s so paralyzing
Ooh
Ooh