Black And Collapsed

Not a word. Not hello, nor how are you
Nothing. No response
I've been eradicated, erased... I'm nothing

Whispers would sound like screams at this point in time
Words that made no sense at all would be ample and comforting

I've been here before and tried to drown it
This time I will try to cut out the heart, tear off the limbs

How this place became so barren and frozen in such a small period is beyond me

I thought there was warmth
I thought stupidly that this was going to be the best year of my life
Farewell to this year, everything it's done to me
Farewell to you for not replying, for not caring enough to take the time to respond to my calls for help

Farewell to everything. This world is dead to me, turns out I'm going to fit in just fine
I'm going to cut my arms open and pull at the heart strings attached to my hands until they snap and die, that must be the way...
everything I touch falls to pieces
Everything I love turns a blind eye

Cut the throat and see what colour it bleeds
cut the ties and see how abruptly it comes to an end

This heart is black and collapsed
I wish my lungs would give in, because I don't have the courage to do it myself
I hate this place I'm in
I only wanted to love
It's not enough