Everybody’s Happy To Be Dead

Will all patrons please remain seated
Oh we all know that it's over when it's over
And we've all longed to hear the fat bitch sing
And when the daily grind just isn't worth the bother any more
And in our dreams the coffin bells all ring
Oh we all know when the final boat is leaving
When the time has come to join a different band
But the priests have always promised us there's no need to be scared
For everybody's happy to be dead
When they're dead
Everybody's happy to be dead
So it is said
Everybody's happy to be dead

Oh we all know when the dream is turning sour
When the time has come to rest our heads in peace
And when, after stormy seas our ship is safely moored at harbour
And out worn out hearts can wrap themselves in sleep
We all know when the world is slipping from us
And it never rains during cemetery hours
But the priests have always promised us there's no need to be scared
For everybody's happy to be dead
When they're dead
Everybody's happy to be dead
So it is said
Everybody's happy to be dead

And I've often seen black sails on the horizon
And I've often felt the Reaper at my side
And St. Peter shakes his keys at me, and Hades cocks his hat
And the Boatman waits to offer me a ride
Oh I often hear the horns of old Valhalla
And the Elysian fields are open wide
But the priests have always promised us there's no need to be scared
For everybody's happy to be dead
When they're dead
Everybody's happy to be dead
So it is said
Everybody's happy to be dead