Lucky You
I never fit in at school
And work was a headache
I struggled all my life to be
Happy and get the rent payed
The only friends I had were in
My head on cassette tapes
I got bullied half to death, I was stressed
I felt like some dead weight
I kept it to myself
And bottled everything inside
And every tiny piece of me I
Felt like peoplе wouldn't like
I tried to hide thеm in the deepest
Darkest corners of my mind
And when I cried I was embarrassed
Told my parents I was fine i was ashamed
But I just wanted mom to hold me
So afraid I medicated daily
When I smoked weed
I couldn't come to terms with all
The reasons I was bullied
So I slowly built my walls up over
Time until I noticed I was lonely
I felt like they forgot me
Neglected by everybody
I would fantasize about shoveling
Dirt on their bodies
Looking back I was lucky that I
Survived and I made it
And they're lucky I used my imagination
I kept it all inside
Been bottled up for all this time
(You're so funny) lucky you
I ain't a kid no more
I'll beat your ass and go to court (Nobody)
Fuck you
Yeah, I couldn't fit in with the kids
I was the outcast
Started skipping school 'cause I
Was happier without class
Tried to drown it out with
Fruity alcohol and loud rap
I wonder if those kids are sorry now
Somehow I doubt that
I blocked it out for twenty
Years, it still hurts, the pills worked
But I still can't forget how
Much it killed me, need to heal first
Talkin' to my therapist, afraid I'm weak
I will learn
At least the bad experiences turned
Into an ill verse i remember when these kids
Invited me to dinner
They poured water on my head from
The roof with a pitcher
They could've actually killed me
It was the middle of the winter
I walked home frozen solid
Frostbitten and bitter
I felt like they forgot me
Neglected by everybody
I would fantasize about shoveling
Dirt on their bodies
Looking back I was lucky that I
Survived and I made it
And they're lucky I used my imagination
I kept it all inside
Been bottled up for all this time
(You're so funny) lucky you
I ain't a kid no more
I'll beat your ass and go to court (Nobody)
Fuck you
I felt so small and worthless
I thought that I deserved it
I kept it under the surface
But I gotta let it out
And right now is perfect
I kept it all inside
Been bottled up for all this time
(You're so funny) lucky you
I ain't a kid no more
I'll beat your ass and go to court (Nobody)
Fuck you