Hard Thing

You take my time and my energy
Should be paying for my therapy
And there's only so much
Healing I can do
Before I start blaming you

Yeah I believe in forgiveness
But with god as my witness
Oh she knows
The shit you put me through

So I'm doing the really hard thing
And I won't crawl back to you
Cause heartbreak and misery
Are not things I'm
Willing to renew

Every goodbye has it's colour
Yours black mould just uncovered
And I'm stained by
The shit you put me through

So I'm doing the really hard thing
And I won't crawl back to you
Cause heartbreak and misery
Are not things I'm
Willing to renew, oh

I've been reading short
stories in your diary
I've making a
Million different theories
You're someone new
And I just want you
To make me happy
Or alternatively

I could be reading the manual
On this scared little girl
She's got her shoes
Glued to the floor
Stuck on what I wanna be
And what you think of me

So I'm,
I'm doing the really hard thing
When I don't crawl back to you
Cause heartbreak and misery
Are not things I'm
Willing to renew

Not for you